Wired on Chocolate 
SwitchfootJanuary 12, 2005
Can you imagine how bored I am? I’ve got at LEAST another week to do nothing in. And I just figured out what I’m wearing Friday out of pure boredom. I need to get a hold on JJ and tell her I need a ride to the dance, and if Matt can’t go, I have to get a hold of Dan. Yeah. Hectic. Sure. Nevermind the fact I can’t do any of this until 5 to make sure everyone gets home, and even then, I can’t call JJ until 7ish and I need to talk to Matt after he cleans his room. So I’m going to have a busy 7-10 pm tonight. Hmm. Odd isn’t it? I am so pissed, and I don’t know why.
Okay, I have this huge sneaking feeling that someone isn’t telling me something big. I have this gut instinct that says that someone is keeping a big secret from me, because everyone is way distant. I swear. Everyone seems to be drifting away from me, and it’s not just because I’m moving. Hell, I’ve felt it since the beginning of the school year. Bri and Kate drifting away I can understand, because I haven’t seen Kate since her birthday, and I haven’t seen Bri since the Homecoming Dance. Yeah. Sucks, don’t it?
I’ve decided something today. If Matt can’t go to the dance, then I won’t go. Why? Well, that was the only real reason I was going to go, was to go to one last dance with him before I moved. If he’s not going to be there, it kind defeats the purpose, doesn’t it? Yeah. That’s what I thought. So, if Matt can’t go, I’ll go over to JJ’s and wait for her to get home. Sounds fun doesn’t it? Heh. Yeah right.
I am so bored right now, I’m writing about 20000000000 bazillion words per minute because I’m ‘letting out anger’. Bullshit. Yeah. Boredom is my poison, and the computer is my remedy. Isn’t that sad? I want to go out, kill myself by walking around, or something – I just want to go outside and do something. Build an ice castle. Anything. I am so friggin bored it is not funny. All I can do is stay inside and type on the frigging Microsoft Word or do chores. Hard choice, right? NOT!
Okay, I feel like strangling something right now, and I do not know where the anger is coming from. I really do not. I’m scared. ^sobs^ I need a hug. I really do. I need to STOP TYPING RANDOM SHIT!
Much better. But it’s still random. ARG! I’ll finish this later, I need to do somethin besides type my little heart out for a while.
Love lots,
LATER
Ah, much better. Muy bien. J Well, I definitely had a little bit of time to think. I am leaving everything I know, and sooner than I’d like. Moving is one of those things that I didn’t think would ever happen, and when it did, it would be my choice. And much later. Right now, I really don’t feel like leaving everyone and everything I’m used to waking to, such as the sound of ambulances. I just got used to it too. Sad. Hmm. Well, I’ve been listening to Switchfoot. Yeah. Boredom. I copied the whole CD to my CPU so if you want to listen to a song, contact me, because I have them for my own use, but I might burn them onto a CD incase this one breaks or scratches. Theres a thought.
Well, just to be pleasant, I’m gonna go drown myself in my bathtub. Have fun.
Love ya’ll,
P.S. I still need a hug. XXOO
LATER AGAIN
Well, I just thought of a lovely idea. I will add bits of my story into my journal, because I just started typing it up again. Well, writing it period. And if you don’t like supernatural stuff, you don’t have to read that part.
Chapter 1: Jakob
~-~-~-~-~
A solitary figure stood in the center of the road, not seeming to move. My gaze fell on the figure as I gazed out the window, watching the snow drift gently in the air in front of my window. I forced my gaze upwards, looking to the snow-filled clouds, but my gaze always dropped back to the figure. My eyebrows rose, almost as in question.
“Who is that…person?” I said aloud to myself, bending over to pick up my boots.
I slowly undid the laces, my gaze still on the figure. Once my boots were unlaced, I bent over to put them on. When I sat upright, the figure had turned, from facing the east, to facing my window. I found myself gazing into the darkness underneath the figure’s hood. I stood, walking swiftly to the doorway, opening the door with amazing speed. The figure slowly turned to face me, and I could feel the weight of a glare set on me. My smile split into a grin, as I finally recognized who it was.
“Moortinstaal, no? Jakob ‘Moortinstaal’ Weitzel. It’s been ages.” I said softly, looking deep into the hood of the man that stood in front of me.
The figure gave a brief nod, and drew back the hood of his cloak. Long, blonde hair came flowing from underneath the hood, his face gaunt and pale, almost as pale as the snow falling from the clouds. I looked him over, then stepped aside to allow him in.
“Please Jakob-come inside. Share a cup of tea with me, old friend.” I said, in a soft voice.
He gave me a smile, and entered.
If anyone wants me to put more, just gimme a comment or a phone call or a email or something. I love this story, it’s one of my better ones. I’ve got most of it posted on fictionpress. If you get impatient, you can read it from there. Good luck findihg it. Rated PG for now, under supernatural. Look fro 5000 words and more. Well, happy reading.
Love once more and always,
Maya Zoe Insanity ‘Camille’ Montgomery-Short
(I am trying to make my name longer.)
((Yes, as in “Insanity is my middle name.” Get it?))
WAIT!
I FORGOT MY SWITCHFOOT LYRICS! Lets see.. Hmm
On Fire
Swichfoot
They tell you where you need to go
They tell you when you need to leave.
They tell you what you need to know
They tell you who you need to be.
But everything inside you
knows there’d more than what you’ve heard.
There’s so much more than empty conversations
filled with empty words.
And you’re on fire when He’s near you
You’re on fire when He speaks
You’re on fire, burning with these mysteries.
Give me one more time around
Give me one more chance to see
Give me everything you are
Give me one more chance to be near you.
When everything inside me
Looks like everything I hate
You are the hope I have for change
You are the only chance I’ll take
And I’m on fire when You’re near me
I’m on fire when You speak
I’m on fire burning with these mysteries.
I’m standing on the edge of me
I’m standing on the edge of me
I’m standing on the edge of me
I’m standing on the edge of me
I’m standing at the edge of everything I’ve ever been before
And I’ve been standing at the edge of me, standing at the edge
And I’m on fire when You’re near me
I’m on fire when You speak
I’m on fire burning with these mysteries.
LATER FOLKS!
Love ya’ll,
Maya
“This is your life, are you who you wanna be?
This is your life, are you who you wanna be?
This is your life, is it everything that you dreamed
that it would be when the world was younger,
and you had everything to loose?”
-- Switchfoot “THIS IS YOUR LIFE”
Pissed off
SWITCHFOOT!January 11, 2005
Wow! I am so happy! I got my Switchfoot CD last night, my grandmother told me I could have 10 bucks off of her gift card. So therefore I was overjoyed to see that Switchfoot was ON SALE! Wee! I am so hyper and happy! So, I’ve got my new obession playing in the backround, just in case anyone was wondering. J Anyways, I know – I shouldn’t write unless I have something to talk about, but hey! I got about 2 hours to do nothing in, so therefore, I might as well type up the randomness that runneth through my brain. Isn’t that just the best?
I miss school SO much… Not just because Matt’s there, though that is a main factor, but because it’s so damn boring here doing nothing. Nothing, I repeat, nothing to do. My STEPDAD packed up all our books and I can’t use the net until 5 pm because of Tom. Stupid Tom. Tom is a tree. See? Random. J Tom is green and leafy… Err. Yeah. Can you tell I haven’t met Tom?
YAY! I got mail! I don’t know how they got my address or anything, but I had to fill out a survey. Labelled GIRLS ONLY. Good thing I’m a girl, eh? I mean, what sort of guy would answer “What is the first thing you look for in a boyfriend” Wait, do NOT answer that question. And, GOD! That envelope tasted awful… Good thing they don’t make envelope flavored suckers – no one would buy them. J
Hey, for everyone who reads this, I don’t suppose you could do a little survey for me, and send it to me via email? I’ve got way too much time on my hands, so just bear with me.
I know it’s stupid, but just answer the question)
I know it sounds stupid, but it reveals a lot about a personality)
Okay, and just for kicks, just so all of you can laugh, I will answer these to the best of my ability with my sarcastic mind. Yes, I am sarcastic.
I am so bored! School just ended one minute ago, and I hope J is after a little bit so that I can talk to her and Matt and Laura and Kay (if she wants to talk to me) and Chris and everyone! Boy do I love rambling! I hope that Matt can call me when he gets home, because otherwise I will be supremely bored. I swear.
Oooh… Sad song. I attempted to draw a teardrop on Microsoft Word. Saddening, ain’t it? Well, so – Anything else I can write? OO! I’m gonna put up a set of lyrics on here.
Switchfoot
She told him she’d rather fix her makeup
than try and fix what’s going on
But the problem keeps on calling
even with the cell phone gone.
She told him that she believes in living
bigger than she’s living now
But her world keeps spinning backwards
and upside down.
Don’t say so long, you’re not that far gone.
Don’t spin today away, ‘cause today will soon be
Gone, like yesterday is gone
Like history is gone
Just try and prove me wrong and pretend like you’re immortal.
She said, he said, like like no tomorrow
Everyday we borrow brings us
one step closer to the edge.
Infinity.
Where’s your treasure, where’s your hope,
if you get the world and lose your soul?
She pretends like she pretends like she’s immortal.
Don’t say so long, and throw yourself wrong
This could be your big chance to make-up
Today will soon be
Gone, like yesterday is gone
Like history is gone
The world keep spinning on
You’re going, going
Gone, like summer break is fone,
Like Saturday is gone
Just try and prove me wrong and pretend like you’re immortal
We are not infinit
We are not permanent
Nothing is immediate
And we pretend like we’re immortal
We are so confident in our accomplishments
Look at our decadence
Gone, like Frank Sinatra, like Elvis and his mom,
Like Al Pacino’s cash, nothing lasts in this life
Gone, my High School dreams are gone,
my childhood sweets are gone
Life is a day that doesn’t last for long.
Like is more than money, time was never money
Time was never cash, life is still more than girls.
Life is more than hundred dollar bills and roto-tom fills.
Life is more than fame and rock and roll and thrills,
All the riches of the kings end up in wills
We’ve got information in the information age
but do we know what life is outside of out convenient Lexus cages?
She said he said live like no tomorrow
every moment that we borrow brings us closer
to a God who’s never been short of cash
Hey Bono, I’m glad you asked.
Life is still worth living, life is more than we are.
Wow! Four pages on Word, and I only reached that because of the lyrics. Better split.
Love you all very much,
Maya
“This is your life, are you who you wanna be?
This is your life, are you who you wanna be?
This is your life, is it everything that you dreamed
that it would be when the world was younger
and you had everything to loose?”
-Switchfoot “THIS IS YOUR LIFE”
Odd
Martina McBrideDecember 7, 2005
Hey ya’ll! I’m still a Duluthian, and proud of it! I won’t leave here until about Thursday next week, or at least that the soonest day we’ll be leaving. I SO love Duluth. God, you rock my face off! Heh… Sorry, something that lasted from Kris. Don’t ask, really.
You know what, I feel like rambling about the Vineyard. Last week was my official last youth group, so I have to say a final goodbye.
TO THE VINEYARD –
I really enjoyed my time at The Well. Everyone was extremely cool, and I loved each and every single one of the people. The Well did a whole lot more for me than just to meet a few people and to sit and bore myself learning about God. That’s what happened at my church, I’d spend my time drawing on those enchanting Scribble Cards. Heh. Anyways, I just thought I’d say something. Before I heard about the Vineyard (Thank you Maria for introducing me to SO many enchanting and awesome events), I was totally dead to the world. Almost an atheist. That’s really saying something. Then, one day, about two years ago, one of my best friends, Maria Staubus, invited me to the only real non-Church related activity at a church that I had ever been to. The awesome Lord of the Rings costume party thing. We spend weeks working on costumes and accents for my costume, and I absolutely loved it. With my dearest friend Maria’s help, I gained a bobblehead of Frodo. That broke that night. But that’s not the point. I returned again this year for the same party, and again, with Maria’s help, had a blast at the party, and I decided that I wanted to continue going to this church. So, once again with Maria’s help, I found the people responsible and started going to their youth group, AKA The Well. I got rides with Elle every time I could go, and I loved it. When I went, I loved the messages that Kris gave, but that’s not really what pushed me over the edge for this (excuse my language) ‘religious bullshit’ as I so called it.
One time in September, they had a retreat, and I decided – hey, I’ll go. So, with a little bit of help, I ^cough^ got some money, and I went. Carelessly Passionate was one of the best things I’ve ever done in my life. The first night, we got there, and immediately went down to the cafeteria. We had a ^gasp^ pro chef, which was awesome. Robert, you are the best spaghetti maker in the world! Anyways, I’m getting off topic. I got my room, which I shared with Lauren, Dre-Dre, and Elle. The first night, we stayed up until 4 and called basically everyone on Elle’s phone, but hey – what can you do with 4 hyper, sleep deprived girls? Heh. Anyways, the next morning, we all went and did our things until the first message, which I can’t really remember at all. What really affected me was the message right before the talent show. Ragman. That message will always make me tear up when Ithink about it. Kris told us to think of things that we were holding on to, and to go put them in a bowl, and they would be thrown into the bonfire. EVERYBODY cracked. I tried to hold on to my sanity, I swear. I cracked. The message was beautiful (READ BY DAVE! XDD), and the whole fire thing was extremely an emotional point in my life. I cried my bloody little eyes out, I’m proud to say. I’m proud because, when you feel you have to let something go, sometimes it’s the best thing to get them out in the open.
I always try to forget about what other people think of me, and until then it was one of the most horrifying parts of my life. From then to now, I always think of it as a breeze in the wind, and watching it disappear in the wind. I rather believe it’s one of my more appealing factors. A few other things that pushed me over the edge was my parents. Before that moment, whenever I thought of my parents, I remembered the bruise my mom gave me when I was complaining that there was no room in the cupboard for the peanut butter we had just boughten. You really do NOT want to duck when your parents try to hit you. It hurts more the second time. Anyways, my parent’s beatings, my always trying to please other people more than just pleasing me were only a few. I let go of love, all those past loves that had ravaged and torn my heart to pieces. I thought that I couldn’t seriously do anything like that again, so I let it go. All the little holes that Mike, Max, everyone left. I can’t seriously say I miss them. Mike is now my greatest male friend, I never talk to Max or Sean, David and Eddie are my favorite foreign friends past Martin, but that’s where I’m ending my list. I don’t want to embarrass myself from listing all my past relationships. I let go of basically everything that’s hurt me in the past that I couldn’t possibly let go of. I swear, my life has changed SO much since then, and it’s been for the better.
Thank you, so much, Kris, for everything that you’ve done for my life. My lifestyle, though very insignificant, has changed, and it’s thanks to you, Maria, Nikki, and God. Maria, thank you so much for introducing me to the Vineyard. Without you, I’d still be the little stuckup you knew in seventh grade. Amazing, eh? Nikki, thank you, because you’ve helped me, and talked to me about the things that I’ve said are important to me, and never forced me into talking about something I really didn’t want to. You and everyone at the Vineyard are my true, everlasting friends. If I never return to Duluth, I will see you all in heaven. Thank you God, for dying on the cross for me. Though it’s never truly been apparent before now, I love what you’ve done for me, and I give you my life. Take me wherever you wish to lead me, and lead me wherever you want me to do your bidding. Thank you, my Lord, my Savior, for all you’ve given me.
Well, that was a bit interesting. I wrote more than I thought I would. Hmm. Anyway, it’s about 11:19 and I still have nothing else to write about. Odd. Hmm. Well, a little birdy sent me an email, and I would like to write about that for a while.
TO MY LITTLE BIRDY (LOL “GAS-KAN”)
Anne, you kick butt! Er… As Kris says “You rock my face off” and you do, chicky! I don’t know what I’d do without you or Jess or Laura, or even – yes, I know it’s hard to admit this – Chris, I really don’t know where I’d be. Jess and Allie helped me through sixth grade, my first and last year at Nettleton, and without them I would’ve had a horrible time. Now they are my everlasting friends. I can’t remember exactly how I met you, though, my friend “Gas-Kan”, but you are one of my greastest, dearest friends, and I really don’t know how I’d survive without you by my side, supporting me all the way, no matter how obsessed with… “C-Dogg” (snickers) you are. Girl, I have a bit of advice for you.
Go at it, chicky! You deserve the best guy you could ever get, more than I do. “C-Dogg” (snickers again) is NOT someone who deserves you, no matter how much you obsess over him… You deserve someone with a hell of a lot more taste. Okay, I’m just gonna say ? instead of “C-Dogg” because “C-Dogg” sounds odd. Heh. ? has absolutely no taste in girls, I mean, comon – if he went out with Mary Ann, then trust me – he’s not good enough for you. You deserve someone a hell of a lot better.
Anyways, I decided, since you’re the only who’s sent me an email about my journal, that I should write out a whole section about you. You kick butt!
Love you forever, my sister.
Now my problem is, what else do I write about? On Microsoft Word, this takes up almost two pages, so I’m a bit scared to see what it takes up when I get net access. Hmm. Anyways, here we go.
TO MY HEART, MY SOUL, AND MY LIGHT (MATT)
If you seriously knew how much I love you, then I really wouldn’t have to write a whole section about it, but I know you know I love you, and I just feel like reciting it to the world. And yes, I say the world. I mean, when it’s getting sent to people in Portugal and in Ireland, you can safely say the world. If I really had never gone to the Vineyard, and I was still the little snob that was going out with Chris because she was insane, you wouldn’t truly know who I am. But because I’ve changed, you know me better than I know myself.
I only met you a few months ago, a week or two after the retreat, and I had just discovered that I had changed. Me, Maya, had accomplished what I had wanted to do for years on end, and I succeeded. I don’t think that I’d be in love with you now if I changed, because back then, it was true. I didn’t look at inside the heart, I looked at the cover of the book, per say. Okay, I lied, I still do – that’s what really drew me to you in the first place. Let’s just say you’re my type. But after knowing you for just a few days, I knew what I wanted, and that one thing was you. I wanted to be with you for the rest of my life, but the thing I was scared most about was rejection. It always scares me, but hey – I don’t let it show for a reason. Rejection is one of my greatest fears. When you didn’t reject me, but you accepted me as a person and a human being, and for what I was, I was surprised. I didn’t think that anyone wanted to be with me that badly, and I truly thought that I was nothing. Until you came around. You’ve changed my perception about myself.
My friends have truly guided me to finding my true self, and have helped me with our relationship whenever they could. Sometimes they just made it worse, but I didn’t say that. Look at Dustin. ^grumbles^ Anyways, I really don’t know what I’d do without you. I think of all those nights that I spend lying in my bed lookng at my extremely bumpy ceiling, thinking of you, and I don’t know what I’d do. Without you, all I am is skin and bones. Without my friends, I’m just a bundle of air. But I have friends, and I have you. I’m actually a human being with a heart, and it’s in your belonging.
You have a heart of gold, Matt, you really do, and I prize you for it. Liz told me everyday that I could do better than you, and I know that I can’t. Liz can just go to hell, because I don’t have to put up with her shit anymore. She can keep her own damn opinions to herself. I love you with all my heart, and I couldn’t imagine myself with anyone else, not with sanity. I mean, I’d have to be insane not to love you. Really.
Okay, I know a lot of people would say this is way too much to write about a guy, but guys, you’ve gotta listen! This is someone I want to spend the rest of my life with! Give me a break! Seriously, people. Get a life. I have one, but in a week I’m going to be farther away from it than I’d like.
Nearing the halfway point for 3 pages, I think it’s time to say goodbye. Yeah. Good idea.
I love you all with all of my heart,
Mixed up
Angst. Heh. I have my Drowning PoolWell, I have decided - I have enough time, why not make a spiffy new journal entry and tell you all the new things about me? Which isn't much, I know - but please, deal with me!
RPGs
I could really ramble for houirs and hours about my RPGs, but I'll try to keep it to a minimum
HarryPotterRolePlaying Wow, HPRP is getting really fun and spiffy now. I love the site, and it's a heck of a lotta fun to RP with people you don't know. Did you know that?
Arianna Ranger now has a love interest! Isn't it the best EVER? Yeah, little Jack McCormick and her got together for a movie and now sparks are flyin. You could see it was going to happen from the first postie! This is SO fun to do, mess up with your character's life. Heh.
Rose Bennett now has a holiday home at the Matthew's place. Don't ask how that came about because I wouldn't be the first to know. It was all Lizzeh's idea, I swear. Lizzeh is going to be living just a few hours away from me when I move! I will have a new friend! 
Draco Malfoy also has a love interest. Callista Addams is now his girlfriend, and I am so happy to play him! Draco is technically my second male I've ever roleplayed, but hey - Grant kinda hit the dust a wee bit. Grant Foucal sucked. Anyways, he's my first decent male character. Well... Second place, now.
Xavier Malfoy is my one and only vampire. I love playing supernatural freaks, I really do. There was this one supernatural being ite where I was a werewolf, but hey - the immortals are sexy in leather! I SO want to see a movie of Guilty Pleasures, and Stuart Townsend would be my first choice for Jean Claude. Heh. Off topic.
Into Darkness Wow, my first semi- successful site that I've ever been able to produce. Isn't that just sad? There's only a few people on this site - Rob, who plays Harry, Pep, who plays Draco, Chao, who plays Tandy and Max, and my dearest Matthew, who plays Aranel. I play all the rest of the book characters. Isn't that sad?
Hermione Granger, omg she has a love interest as well! Hmm, I wonder if I like making my chars fall in love... Uh. YEAH! It's fun. I'll have to put down my sig-thing for Mione at the end. And my Deb one. Anyways, off topic! Ron Weasley. Hmm. I wonder if JK Rowling's gonna do that in her books.
Selene Weitzel is in a bit of a love triangle.. She likes Harry, but she's already admitted to Draco that she loves him, or at least that's what she THINKS! Bwah, I wanna do a little bit of Gryff-Slyth cross action, so I might make her love Harry. Who knows.
Deborah Khun is quickly turning into my favorite character. She's falling for Aranel, and they are SUCH a cute couple! They just don't know it yet! I really can't explain her character without giving away my plot, but she's special. Let's just leave it at that.
I'm not gonna explain Chocolate Frogs and Warm Blankets or Moonshine University, because CFAWB I haven't been posting in, and MU is dead. Really dead. So I'll stop on RPGs
Daily Life
Wow, if this isn't the biggest underestimate, I dunno what is. I'm alive every day, and life sucks right now. That's about all that NEEDS to be said, but that's not all I WANT to say.
The biggest problem in my life now is the fact that I'm moving. Away from all I know, and away from all I love. Yes, I do not say I love my parents because if they loved me, they wouldn't move. Since they do not love me, I do not love them. Small world. I really don't want to move, it's all a thing I really do not want to even think about. I don't want to move, I want to stay. Even if it means hiding underneath Audrey's bed, so be it. I don't give a crap. I don't want to move away from Matt. He's my life, you know. Without him, I really have no reason for living.
So, I've told you all about that. That's all that really needs to be said, . I kept tru to my word yesterday, and I flew up those stairs out of Matt's van, and broke into tears the second I hit the opposite side of the door. Ever since, I've been sitting and looking at his picture, because I know I'll never see him again. ^sigh^ bad subject.
I am leaving. Goodbye. If you never see me again, I died. Just think of it that way. I love you all to tiny little pieces.
Forever in your heart, or at least I hope,
Maya Zoe Montgomery
InspiredOkay, I think it's high time for a halfway serious and halfway real journal entry. What do you think?
Every day do I find myself more and more like one of those little girls who can't think past what their future should be - all time to stop and smell the roses. One of those who say 'I got the time, why not use it usefully?' Well, I also find myself looking at it at a different perspective.
I was once one of those little girls, I was. I wantedto be swept off into the sunset and live happily ever after. 90% of me still does, I admit. But I'm not perfect, and I don't expect my future to be. When I say 'I wish to be rescused by a prince' (just to use a phrase figuratively) there are a few meanings to that.
Okay, I have to say, I had to put SOME humor in here, because this is such a dry subject. Most girly-girls tend to place themselves in the second one of age 10 and under, and the rest of us - well, we just hang in #3. I'm sure #1 would be a spectacular place to be - and there are many who I know who fit under that catagory now. But that's not the point. The point is, the brats and the princesses and the normals are the least likely to find love. Okay, so it's not exactly true, because I've fallen in love. But I do have a point with this.
The ones who term themselves as #3 (AKA me) tend to have an... odd view on things. This world we live in is disgusting and rotten, and only with the right kind of 'treatment' - as the brats would call it - will we be able to live in the pollution with civility. In other words, we need a helping hand, a lighthouse over foggy waters, to lead us through. A light of the path. Some of the more religious people call this helper God. I call him Matt.
Okay okay okay, I know - I have to get to my point. My point - no matter if the princess is hidden somewhere deep inside of us, and hope for a white prince to take us away so we never see the light of the awful city day, there is a yourself somewhere deep inside. A person who finds a yearning. Call it your gut instinct. My best advice to females - follow your gut. If you don't follow you gut, things will really be bad for you. I know this from first hand experiance.
Truth be told, I've found love, and in the most unexpected place that I never thought even existed. My first year of high school, and I'm already deeper than I ever drempt I could be. Thank you God, for sending me such a gift from heaven, such a beacon for my life. Even if things don't turn out like my dreams, I can walk through this life with guidance from You and your heavenly messangers.
Thanks to Steve who inspired me to write this almost - sermon. Thank you Duluth Gospel Tabernacle for joining with the Vineyard for Blitz, and so I could hear this message. Over the past few months I've had more of an experiance with God than anywhere else, and I thank the supreme people responsible - Kris, Nikki, Steve, and of course - God. I feel that this is part of his supreme plan, and that I should be writing this as it flows gently through my mind. I feel God's presence every day, and I feel comforted by it. Thank you.
I love you all very dearly.
-Maya
I have good vibes.
Eminem on Josh's computer WOW!
Leik, OMG I have juicy news! And OMG does my eyes hurt! I just like... stuck my finger in my eye on accident, and now my eye is stinging and hurts like hell. Anyways, my juicy news of the day - I GOT EVIDENCE, BABY! We now can prove that Drew and Roger are... GAY! Bwahahaha! Just joking, guys. I'm still gonna post that cute picture of you guys up when I get it developed, so beware. Bwahahahahaha. You wonder... Nevermind, I won't finish that statement.
So, how is life, my pesky little snooping friends? Mine's going swell as sunshine, really. I love my life. I really do. I swear I do.
Don't believe me?
Piss on this! 
The reason I love my life so much is one pure factor and reason that shines above all the other little tiny reasons that I don't serious consider anything... drastic, per say. AKA Suicide. I tried once. Binders are actually very nasty. I don't like them very much. Anyways, getting off subject. That one reason, believe it or not, is my ... how shall I put this... l'autre art de l'auto-portrait, the lumière de ma vie. My un et seulement. Just for a bit of French. Mon et seulement celui porte mon coeur dans le sien poche de dos sans lui sachant, celui qui tient la clef sur tout ce qui concerne moi. Celui qui je souhaite être avec toujours. That enough French for ya, J?
Love ya all much,
Cami
Translations: l'autre art de l'auto-portrait - other self; lumière de ma vie - light of my life; un et seulement - one and only; Mon et seulement celui porte mon coeur dans le sien poche de dos sans lui sachant, celui qui tient la clef sur tout ce qui concerne moi. Celui qui je souhaite être avec toujours. - My one and only that carries my heart in his back pocket without him knowing, the one who holds the key to anything that pertains to me. The one who I wish to be with always.
Loved
WOW!
WOW! Like, OMG! I've got another goddamned journal! Heh. Joys. Hey, at least I can reply to this one from school when I get bored. Oh well, so how is everyone? ^hears silence^ ^sighs^ Fine, be that way. Since you guys are all snoops and reading my private journal (though it's not really private, it's on Bravenet) I might as well put the juicy details on here. Wait, is that what you're here for? Go get your own juicies! JUST KIDDING! I'll put stuff up now. Just a small bit of stuff, I've got 15 minutes.
Well, I really don't have juicy stuff for like... 7 in the morning. So you're going to have to suffer. Until fourth hour. SCHOOL SUCKS, BOMB THE DAMN SCHOOL! Gee, I hope my teachers don't see that ^>^
Love,
Cami
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